Hi Everybody!

I love this shot.  Great mix of sincerity, honesty and openness.
The complete Clegg package, captured for posterity.

I've been taking a bit of stick from the fuckin students over the last couple of weeks so I've decided to set up this blog to get a bit of good publicity going.  I'll be talking about playing darts, going down the pub, politics, life, and literally anything else that my team think might go down well with the punters.

Before we get down to the serious stuff, just thought I'd tell you all that I've been voted 'Politician of the Year' by the Spectator magazine.  Must be doing something right eh?

Unfortunately, not everyone is quite so enlightened.  The fuckin students for example.  The problem with these fuckin protests is that they reflect a deep mis-comprehension of how my new brand of politics works.  Let me explain.  In a perfect world, of course, election promises would be kept.  Nobody wants to break promises, do they?  But these students are acting like I deliberately cunted them over for a chance of power, which is complete bollocks.  Cunts. 

As I was signing those enormous stupid fuckin cardboard pledges before the election, I 100% meant to keep to my word not to raise tuition fees.  The problem was, when I made the pledge, I simply didn't know how big the Clegg brand could become.  As I swept to victory in the general election, a new political landscape emerged.  I was the star of the election.  The belle of the ball.  A new era had arrived, and I was riding shotgun on the cutting edge of the political zeitgeist. 

You've got to keep your ideas fresh in such a dynamic environment.  Our old policies from before I exploded into the nation's consciousness seemed like they were from another world.  A medieval, pre-Cleggian world.  So I had to look to the future, and discard the past.  How  progressive is that? Exactly.

So stop fuckin whinging.